By Zoe holder
The monster castle
once upon a time there was 2 children playing in the water one was 9 and the other one was 12. They were going to the beach for a swim because it was a hot day there mum was just going to lie on a beach and read a book with a umbrella.
So then the kids put their togs on and run into the when they got inside they saw a castle on a motion floating then it was coming close to them. It was coming closer and closer then it speeded up our mum saw it and said come out of the water but the children could not hear her.
But when it got really close they realised it was a monster so they try to get out of the water but the monster grab them. there mum tried to get them but then the monster grabbed her to then the monster put them in the castle and swam away.
They then realised that there was a castel on top the went inside and they saw huge rooms and servants and everything they could dream for. When they woke up they saw servants standing around them getting ready to give them there breakfast.
By zoe holder
Hi zoe I liked your blog post I could see it was imaginative and it built a picture in my mind it does have a few mistakes could you please read thru it and change it but I was wondering did the children escape could you add more information?
ReplyDeletehi Zoe I really liked how the story started and then it got a bit scary I even thought that the monster was going to eat the kids for a bit.
ReplyDeleteWhat did happen after the servants gave them breakfast?